Large Scale Central

Technical support for complex software

General Discussion
#1

INSTALLING A HUSBAND

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow-down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as:

• Romance 9.5
• Personal Attention 6.5

and installed undesirable programs, such as:

• NBA 5.0
• NFL 3.0
• Golf Clubs 4.1

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate.

DEAR DESPERATE,

First, keep in mind:

• Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package
• Husband 1.0 is an operating system

Please enter ithoughtyoulovedme.html into your browser and download Tears 6.2. Do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, remember that overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad program, as it will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0. It runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program, as it is guaranteed to crash Husband 1.0.

Husband 1.0 has limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend:

• Cooking 3.0
• Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck Babe!
Tech Support

#2

Just shows you how little imagination the guys at tech support have!

  1. Defrag the HardDrive - this will speed up the search for the correctly related info on any and all input from you

  2. Delete all temp files which are related to Husband 1.0 - this is like a clean slate i.e. glitches and hangs are much fewer

  3. Reboot in order to clean some of the other “junk” - but be careful which size of boot you apply, too small won’t do much good, too large could do some damage

You didn’t specify the hardware, however many of our clients had much better luck with a “Mac” i.e McDermott.

#3
Hans-Joerg Mueller said:
Just shows you how little imagination the guys at tech support have!

  1. Defrag the HardDrive - this will speed up the search for the correctly related info on any and all input from you

  2. Delete all temp files which are related to Husband 1.0 - this is like a clean slate i.e. glitches and hangs are much fewer

  3. Reboot in order to clean some of the other “junk” - but be careful which size of boot you apply, too small won’t do much good, too large could do some damage

You didn’t specify the hardware, however many of our clients had much better luck with a “Mac” i.e McDermott.


Better hope your better half doesn’t read this, HJ - you’ll be formatted for sure!

#4
Dave Healy said:
Hans-Joerg Mueller said:
Just shows you how little imagination the guys at tech support have!

  1. Defrag the HardDrive - this will speed up the search for the correctly related info on any and all input from you

  2. Delete all temp files which are related to Husband 1.0 - this is like a clean slate i.e. glitches and hangs are much fewer

  3. Reboot in order to clean some of the other “junk” - but be careful which size of boot you apply, too small won’t do much good, too large could do some damage

You didn’t specify the hardware, however many of our clients had much better luck with a “Mac” i.e McDermott.


Better hope your better half doesn’t read this, HJ - you’ll be formatted for sure!

Worse, he’ll be “Prepped.”