Large Scale Central

Questions to ponder

General Discussion
#1
  1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
  2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
  3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
  4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
  5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?
  6. Why does “slow down” and “slow up” mean the same thing?
  7. Why does “fat chance” and “slim chance” mean the same thing?
  8. Why do “tug” boats push their barges? Sometimes they are call push boats, but they can still tug.
  9. Why do we sing “Take me out to the ball game” when we are already there?
  10. Why are they called “stands” when they are made for sitting?
  11. Why is it called “after dark” when it really is “after light”?
  12. Doesn’t “expecting the unexpected” make the unexpected expected?
  13. Why are a “wise man” and a “wise guy” opposites?
  14. Why do “overlook” and “oversee” mean opposite things?
  15. Why is “phonics” not spelled the way it sounds?
  16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?
  17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
  18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
  19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
  20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?
  21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?
  22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?
  23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?
  24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren’t we clean when we use them?
  25. Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
  26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?
  27. Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?
  28. Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
#2
  1. If we save daylight in the summer with daylight savings time why can’t we spend it during the winter when we need it?
#3

Ric - Although you and the late great George Carlin are pretty much opposites on most things - you have a similar list of questions :slight_smile:

#4
  1. If it’s tourist season, why can’t you shoot them?
#5
Mik said:
30. If it's tourist season, why can't you shoot them?
coz then they'll stop coming, and bringing all that lovely cash
#6
Ric Golding said:
15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?
it's all Greek to me
#7
Jon Radder said:
Ric - Although you and the late great George Carlin are pretty much opposites on most things - you have a similar list of questions :)
Always liked George, especially as the "Hippy/Dippy Weatherman". I hope to out live him with our different lifestyles. ;-)
#8
Ric Golding said:
Jon Radder said:
Ric - Although you and the late great George Carlin are pretty much opposites on most things - you have a similar list of questions :)
Always liked George, especially as the "Hippy/Dippy Weatherman". I hope to out live him with our different lifestyles. ;-)
You already have. George passed a year or so ago.
#9

Some see the glass as half empty, and some see the glass as half full… I just wanna know what you’re doing with my glass???

… and you’d better not be putting ice in my scotch!

#10

Ric,
I wouldn’t of thought you had any time for pondering :wink:
Ralph

#11

“I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.”

THEN I SAID, “Hey! Gimme your shoes! You don’t need 'em!”

Can’t remember whose line that was,
David Meashey

#12
  1. Why do clocks run clockwise?
  2. How come no one thinks twice of a guy running around half-naked in the dead of winter all painted up like his fav. football team; yet a guy in decent clothes and a camera, sitting quietly, bothering no one at a railroad crossing is a freaking geek?
#13

…grinning…

#14
Jon Radder said:
Ric Golding said:
Jon Radder said:
Ric - Although you and the late great George Carlin are pretty much opposites on most things - you have a similar list of questions :)
Always liked George, especially as the "Hippy/Dippy Weatherman". I hope to out live him with our different lifestyles. ;-)
You already have. George passed a year or so ago.
Yeah, I knew he died, but I've never bothered to look up his age. I think he was older than 62 or 63 (the period of time I am passing through this year).

However, the drugs could have just made him look that old and he really died at 27.

#15

Imagine being the first vacuum cleaner salesman, trying to sell a machine that sucks.