Bear with me here, a couple days ago, and I don’t remember which thread it was in, or if it was here or MLS, someone was adamant that they had a Metric Crescent Wrench. Coincidently, today in the RCCrawler forum I’m on, someone posted a pic of one in the Funny Pictures thread.
Mike
We used to pull a trick about this on new Airmen coming into the shop from tech-school. Most crescent wrenches are marked on the handle for their length. One side was standard 8" and 10" are common. On the other side they were marked 200mm and 250mm. We would lay one with the standard side up and the other with the metric side up. Jr birdman was then sent to the tool box to get the metric crescent wrench. Protests would ensue resulting in the Sgt walking new guy over and showing him that such a thing did exist, explaining that the difference was how the barrel moved the jaw thus effecting at what intervals the spacing best fit metric or standard. Hilarity reigned…ahh good times.
And if you think that was bad you should have seen what happened when we sent them to the runway manager for 100 yards of flight line or too Security Forces to get a bottle of Caynienpea solution.
Yes, Mike, as I shared on the other site, I’ve had one of those in my tool box for a long time. It works great. It’s so very handy and it’s no problem at all with any SAE or Metric nut. Human or otherwise. (http://www.largescalecentral.com/externals/tinymce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-cool.gif)(http://www.largescalecentral.com/externals/tinymce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-tongue-out.gif)(http://www.largescalecentral.com/externals/tinymce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-cool.gif)(http://www.largescalecentral.com/externals/tinymce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-embarassed.gif)(http://www.largescalecentral.com/externals/tinymce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-smile.gif)(http://www.largescalecentral.com/externals/tinymce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-cool.gif)(http://www.largescalecentral.com/externals/tinymce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-tongue-out.gif)
One of our club members went to all the trouble of building a wooden crate to ship something to an American buyer. The goods arrived in good shape, but the buyer was annoyed because he didn’t have a Robertson (square head) screwdriver to remove the screws and open the crate.
Oddly enough if you use the search function on the Canadian Home Depot website for a Robertson screwdriver you get no results. They do sell them and Robertson screws as well.
Metric Crescent Wrench … hmm … having never encountered a metric crescent I’m at a loss as to why it would need to be wrenched.
On a more serious note. For those needing small metric crescent wrenches (or sockets) check out tools at Model Motorcars at https://www.modelmotorcars.com/ You will find a nice selection of Crescent Wrenches from .5mm - 2.5mm.
Speaking of flight line humor. I was an Air Traffic Controller at Kadena Air Base in the early 1970’s. Kadena’s tower is a cement structure about 150 tall. We had a young Airman in training. One night the Tele Auto Writer’s paper alarm went off (out of paper) and the Shift Supervisor jumped the airman who was in a state of shock over the loud buzzing noise. The super showed the Airman how to silent the alarm and then provided instructions of how to remove the wooden core and install a new role of paper. After all was done the super took the wooden core, walked to the back of the tower, climbed the roof ladder, opened the hatch and placed the wooden core on the tower roof - secured the hatch, climbed down and told the airman that was standard procedure.
Sooo the airman proceeded to go through this routine on a regular basis for a few months, all without comment from any team members. One day the Chief Master Sgt for all controllers was up in the tower to observe our crew’s operations and team work. Well the Tel Auto Writer’s alarm went off and the chief watched as the new troop changed the paper and then calmly walked past the Chief, climbed the ladder and put the wooden core on the roof of the tower. After our new troop got back down the Chief asked him just what the hell he was doing. The airman didn’t flinch a bit and told the Chief that twice a year an Okinawan carpenter would come up and collect the wooden cores. The Chief, beside himself, sternly asked the Airman just what the hell the carpenter would do with the wooden cores? At that point my Shift Super calmly told the Chief that the carpenter needed the wooden cores to make Assholes for Hobby Horses! After the laughter stopped, so did the Tele Auto Writer “special ops”.
You can get the Cresent metric adjustable wrench at the depot.
This picture only shows the front side, the rear IS metric. I have had one for many years.
These are some funny stories, like sending a new guy to get a left handed monkey wrench, send someone to the supply person for a can of camouflaged vacuum, if you have a young teenager that can drive, take them to an autostore and send them in to get a can of blinker fluid, or a right side muffler bearing. A friend of mine, works at a medium sized steel fab shop, had me cut out a large skeleton key on the laser, with the name inscribed the Basement Key, they send newbies to different guys to get the key to the basement. Now they have one. In my business one of my guys sent a new guy upstairs warehouse to the basement door in the back corner.
Get a see through window glass pane cut at a hardware store.
The other name these are referred to is adjustable wrench, even though the outside non movable head looks like a moon crescent, A company with the name of crescent tool company made the adjustable wrench very famous, with the name of crescent on the handle, permanently giving the adjustable wrench the other name.
Jim Kottkamp said:
On a more serious note. For those needing small metric crescent wrenches (or sockets) check out tools at Model Motorcars at https://www.modelmotorcars.com/ You will find a nice selection of Crescent Wrenches from .5mm - 2.5mm.
Thanks Jim, I just purchased a live steamer and was looking for a micro set of open end wrenches!
Boomer K. said:
Mike
And if you think that was bad you should have seen what happened when we sent them to the runway manager for 100 yards of flight line or too Security Forces to get a bottle of Caynienpea solution.
Drug testing for dogs???
The Jokes All Over guys… I have actually 4 of these…
Now what will we joke about. They actually fit a left handed person.
Living Proof that there ARE… Left handed Metric Cresent wrenches.
Military Photographers humor, We would send the new guy clear across the compound to the supply depot, for 1 pound of half tone dots, after we made him fill out in triplicate a supply requisition form with a FSN that was for a M1A1 main battle tank. The Supply depot SSgt, would catch on and made him hand carry it up to HQ for approval, and they would then send him to Supply Hq. to get an authorization for a non-allocated supply item. It usually took him hours to get back…
Ahh, you are only showing the left side, and us lefties, holding it in our left hand would have the right side facing us.
I liked the one about muffler bearings… when I was a kid, the local motorcycle shop had a box of them on the counter, and newbies were told to buy a couple and drop them in their muffler so they would knock the carbon loose… of course they fell through the holes and rattled around in the muffler for years…
Greg
Aboard ship, FNG’s would get sent for 6 feet of fathom line, relative bearing grease, Fallopian tubes, padeye wrenches, among others. One of my favorites was a bucket of steam, to prime the catapults.
“Metric wrench” has been one of my favorite slang terms for the monkey wrench. Of course, these days with metric tools everywhere might have to start calling that an “Imperial wrench.”
Steve Featherkile said:
Aboard ship, FNG’s would get sent for 6 feet of fathom line, relative bearing grease, Fallopian tubes, padeye wrenches, among others. One of my favorites was a bucket of steam, to prime the catapults.
We told guys to tie the rope to the T-R Double E.
Dave Taylor said:
The Jokes All Over guys… I have actually 4 of these…
Living Proof that there ARE… Left handed Metric Cresent wrenches.
What about left handed can openers as my son would like one?
As kids, when we were tearing up motors, rebuilding them, etc. we had a guy hanging around that made us all crazy, so we sent him off to get a volkswagen radiator hose (in those days they were all air cooled).
Well, the first place he went did not straighten him out, but said they were out, and sent him to another shop. As he left, the store called the next shop and let them in on the gag.
Finally after about 7 shops, the last guy sold him one and he returned, 5 hours later.
We told him we fixed it and to go get his money back.
Greg
Laughing at someone else’s frustration is cruel. I just don’t get the joke, nor see the point.