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  • Topic: New Rule #1 (9/25/2017)

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    • September 29, 2019 4:17 PM EDT
      • Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
         
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      No, but as I found out in the sixth grade, sometimes when you fight back, both the aggressor and the victim get punished. So there are times when its best to not fight back.

      ____________________________________

      Shannon car Shops
      Home of the infamous leg lamp

      I.A.R.R.R. Member #12

      and King Butt Modeler

    • September 29, 2019 5:16 PM EDT
      • Not one of the WannaBe's,
         
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      Bill Sakalaucks said:

      As someone who helps moderate a forum of 100k+ users, things that help to keep the peace have been:

       

      1) Clear posting guidelines that spell out expectations of behavior

      2) Clear consequences for violating said guidelines

       

      Requiring real names seems great in theory, as it adds a personal element to each member, but name calling would still happen. A forum owner that doesn’t manage users even somewhat actively or have a moderating team, will eventually see that community fall apart.

       

       

      Bill, Please let me say that I only grabbed your post to quote as it is short and sweet. Therefore this is not directed toward you.
      I have set back and watch each poster ( old, new, occasional member of this forum) post up their idea of how this forum needs to be ran.


      1. We need moderators
      2. BD needs rules hard and fast ( yes I seem to recall suggesting that title back on one of the other blow ups when he didn't want to suspend a poster.)So I'll feel free to use it as opposed to his real name
      3. BD needs to enforce those rules.
      4. BD needs to add more rules
      5. This is what I think you should do.
      6. I support this sight so these are things you need to do


      Let me remind each and everyone of you that this is NOT YOUR SITE! PERIOD


      BD hosts this site because of his desire to share his love of this hobby with other like minded people. He does not CHARGE you to come into his living room. He holds the door open so we all have a place to share.
      There were other sites that you could go to in years past and, we hear reference to them on a regular basis. REMEMBER the membership of those sites destroyed those sites with their petty ass attitudes and their inability to get along with other members.


      MLS was a clique oriented site where if you weren't a card holder your ONLY answer to your question by a member who is now on here was maybe you should search GOOGLE I'm tired of answering the same newbie questions
      I didn't go to LSOL because you had to pay to get in.


      Now that those sites have closed the same problem children from those sites HAD NOWHERE ELSE TO GO so they came here With their attitudes and met resistance from the membership because we knew what they had done to their sites. FOREWARNED IS FOREARMED.


      This site is what is left and I would hate to see it go.


      It is BD's site HE alone RUNS it, HE alone MAKES the POLICIES, HE seems to be an intelligent adult PERFECTLY CAPABLE of RUNNING this SITE without YOUR INPUT.


      The only thing he needs from any of you is that long lost commodity of RESPECT. SUPPOSEDLY (and I use this loosely because I seriously wonder) YOU are all ADULTS. YOU ACT like the current crappy ME GENERATION we all seem to dislike because the CRY MOMMY ALL THE WAY HOME if they don't get their way. If someone disagrees with you it's THEIR OPINION that they have a right to.
      If they call you out IT REALLY IS OK TO BE THE BIGGER PERSON and IGNORE THEM or message them. WE really don't need YOUR PETTY SQUABBLES.


      That is my two cents. Deal with it

      Edited for spelling and a bit of space

      This post was edited by David Marconi,FOGCH at September 30, 2019 5:16 PM EDT
    • September 29, 2019 5:45 PM EDT
      • Chaco, Paraguay
         
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      Greg Elmassian said:

      1) I get your point Chris, but then Bob....

       

      2) ... as I found with one member that has had it in for me for 10 years, ignoring it does not make it go away.

      the point, dear Sir, at least from my point of view, seems to be, that you are part of the problem, not part of the solution.

      not only, that you tell the forum owner, what he should do, but during the last decade you have driven dozens of members away. everybody, who dared not to agree unconditionally with your viewpoints did get mobbed, till they faded away.

      and if you are trying, to make us blieve, that Rooster, and only Rooster is culpable of the bad mood and modales in the forum, better don't count on everybody beleiving you.

      in a feud, there are always two guilty sides. you both behaved badly... constantly.

       

      *1) it is not your place in the forum to tell Bob, what he has to do.  your last posts make me think about a schoolboy, fearing to be reprimanded: "... but he began!"

       

      *2) how would you know that? you never tried that. you always fought Rooster (and anybody else, who did not bend to you)

       

      i'm really fed up with so much pharisaism.

       

      instead of trying to influence Bob's pending decision, perhaps you should reflect about his dilemma.

      he stands to loose either a lot knowledge about elictricity, or a lot knowledge about Amtrak modeling, or both.

      in any case, we, the forum, loose big time.

       

      --------------------------------

      Bob, i know, that now i have missbehaved greatly. if you kick me for this, it is ok.  but i had to write this post, or explode all over my keyboard.

      ____________________________________

       

      My Chaosplace ->  

    • September 29, 2019 6:48 PM EDT
      • Vail, Az
         
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      David Maynard said:

      No, but as I found out in the sixth grade, sometimes when you fight back, both the aggressor and the victim get punished. So there are times when its best to not fight back.

      Sixth grade this ain't.

      Sorry David, you would have gotten killed on the streets I grew up on. There we were taught to: never back down.

       

      In 2008 I grew tired of LSOL as a buyers club and moved to MLS. Back then I was nervous about putting so much money on the ground, at the end of a dirt road with no fences and a job 30 miles away. You can see my name is traceable.

      Upon security's advice, I looked around and saw a 40/60 breakdown of nicknames/real sounding names.

      I came up with a clever nickname and joined the group.

      That day I got a PM that stated:

      'I know who you are.

      I just ran you off

      and I'm going to do it again.'

       

      That was the day I got my bully.

      I wish he'd leave me alone.

       

      Maybe I should post the letter he sent my home server, a long letter claiming I hate him!!! All because he saw a post quoted and thus out of context. If he wasn't so lazy he could have prevented it by looking in the thread...

       

      I don't hate him and I don't want him banned, but I no longer think he can change. 

      I like it here, I have true friends here, I'd like to spend my last days here.

       

      ____________________________________

      John

       

      The older I get, the less I know, please don't make me prove it.

       

       

    • September 29, 2019 7:01 PM EDT
      • Be Nice or STFU
         
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      Just to be clear, the 10 year feud is not with Rooster, and I know because I have 10 years of private emails.

       

       

      ____________________________________

      Be sure­ to visit ­my site, l­ots of tec­hnical tip­s and modi­fications,­ and you c­an search ­for topics­ and key w­ords.


      ­Click HERE for Greg­'s web sit­e
      PLEASE NOT­E: Please do NOT use private messaging, i­f you have­ a questio­n, feel fr­ee to emai­l me priva­tely, u­se regular­ email onl­y: greg@el­massian.co­m

    • September 29, 2019 7:21 PM EDT
      • Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
         
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      John Caughey said:

      Sixth grade this ain't.

      Sorry David, you would have gotten killed on the streets I grew up on. There we were taught to: never back down.

       

      Are you sure? Some posters act like it is still grade school.

       

      As an adult, in an adult setting, I prefer (usually) to not reply to a perceived attack on me. Its when the name calling and back and forth excrement starts that people are driven out of the forum, and both parties are perceived as instigators. Many have said that we should ignore those posters instead of fighting with them. That is all I am trying to say. I am not trying to argue with anyone. I am trying to say that we should not escalate the tensions by responding to those who are trying to argue with us. 

       

      I have been insulted and I felt personally attacked, from time to time, by certain members here. Seldom did I respond in kind. So I hope that I am not considered to be one of those that is part of the problem.

       

      And when it has been brought to my attention that I did offend someone with one of my posts, I do apologize. I consider the folks here friends of mine, and I really do not like the idea that I have offended a friend of mine.

       

      So John, if my attitude of "letting it pass" gets me killed here in LSC, so be it.

      ____________________________________

      Shannon car Shops
      Home of the infamous leg lamp

      I.A.R.R.R. Member #12

      and King Butt Modeler

    • September 29, 2019 7:35 PM EDT
      • East Brunswick, N J RRR#22
         
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      Korm made me get out my Funk & Wagnalls for "pharisaism", and all I've got to say to that is:

       

       

      "Oh yeah"?

      ____________________________________

      "If I ever go looking for my heart's desire again, I won't look any further than my own backyard. Because if it isn't there, I never really lost it to begin with." - L. Frank Baum

    • September 29, 2019 7:50 PM EDT
      • Milpitas, California
         
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      Bob McCown said:

       

      "It seems it's time for a much simpler, and much more strictly enforced site policy.  Violations will get a warning with an explanation, second violation will earn a 30 day suspension, third will earn a lifetime ban."

       

      I moderate a message board with about 500 members. We have the same policy as Bob does – three strikes and you’re out. A written warning, a one month suspension, then the ban hammer comes down. On our board, the guidelines are very clear and we strictly enforce them. The Admin and me are gettin’ real well known; yeah the bad guys know us and they leave us alone. In the five years I’ve been a Mod there, we’ve imposed two lifetime bans, a one month’s suspension, and maybe a couple of warnings. That’s it. The board continues to attract new members all the time. By the way, preferring not to post real names for security reasons is B.S. Admins and Mods can usually see right through that by monitoring IP’s. Not telling Bob how to run his site; maybe just suggesting a Mod here to hold the fort while he’s not around. 

       

       “Don't be a prick. If there's one rule to remember, remember this one. People have differing views and that's normal. Constructive feedback is always appreciated, but remember this hobby is small enough already without us alienating each other" - Tom White, Facebook G Scale Swap and Shop.

       

       

    • September 29, 2019 9:13 PM EDT
      • Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
         
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      I moderated a site for a while. Most of the bans I handed out were for spamming. But, I did have to PM a warning to a few members. The funny thing is once they knew I was watching them, they just kind of drifted away.

       

      People do have different views, and different ways of accomplishing the same thing. That is why sites like this are valuable. A different view, or technique, may just be what I need to solve something in my hobby, or realize that I am concentrating on a "non issue".

      ____________________________________

      Shannon car Shops
      Home of the infamous leg lamp

      I.A.R.R.R. Member #12

      and King Butt Modeler

    • September 30, 2019 1:31 AM EDT
      • Bundaberg, Queensland Australia
         
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      A 10 year old feud talk about the Hatfield's and McCoy's.

      For crying out loud even the Tax Office (IRS) only keep records for 7 years. 

      Maybe the feuding parties should consider that it may be time to bury the hatchet and I mean figuratively and not in each others head.

      Talk to the person and try reconcile the differences (or agree to disagree and respect each others opinion) that is how adults do it in my country.  Didn't a famous person once say "I may not a agree with what you say but will defend to the death your right to say it" or words to that effect?

      Act your age and not your shoe size folks, whoever you are.

      This post was brought about by the sheer frustration of looking at posts from some people who are acting worse that the 3 year old's next door who's fights last only minutes max.

      If it gets me banned then so be, it because I come in here to look for train information and not fights.

       

       

       

       

       

    • September 30, 2019 5:53 AM EDT
      • South Devon, England
         
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      Anyone familiar with a reconciliation process will know that the first five to ten minutes are spent by the parties blaming each other for the issues.   With skill, once fifteen minutes have passed by,  the  'combatants' begin to realise that they are equally at fault for differing reasons.   Once accepted, by all parties,  progress can be made to diffuse matters.   It doesn't always work, however, as some folk are so entrenched in their views to make a favourable outcome impossible.

      This issue is not unique, as most Members will know.  MLS, Aristo and heavens knows where else have been infected at one time or another. 

      ____________________________________

      regards, Alan

       Nothing is so strong as gentleness. Nothing so gentle as real strength.  Saint Francis de Sales  French saint & bishop of Geneva (1567 - 1622) 

      https://www.dartmouthrailriver.co.uk

      https://www.buckfast.org.uk/

       

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